Dating Apu Nahasapeemapetilon

One of my favorite scenes from The Simpsons involves Apu Nahasapeemapetilon, the proprietor of the Kwik-E-Mart

Here’s the script from that scene, which is a “bachelor auction”:


We have one more bachelor.

[Stops] Wha! 

– [Microphone Feedback] – Just tell them about yourself.

Oh. Um- [Clears Throat] Well, I have a doctorate in computer science.

– [Excited Murmuring From Ladies] – Sounds pretty good to me.

Um, I run my own business, of course.

– Well.
– Well, now.

I do like to cook. I’m not much of a talker, but I love to listen.
And in my leisure time, I like to build furniture and then to have a discussion about where it could be placed in a room.

– [Excited Chattering From Ladies] – Get this man.
He’s wonderful! – Fifty dollars! – Seventy-five! You better have enough left to pay my alimony, Luann.
300.
350.

Sold to the five desperate chicks!

-[All Whooping] – All right! We got ‘im! Hooh! –

Apu becomes Springfield’s #1 lady’s man for a while after that.

This is what happens to your business when you start focusing on things your clients really care about. It’s a strong differentiator that sets you apart from commodity competition.

If you don’t know what your clients are going to care about, you don’t know them well enough.

If don’t know which people at prospective clients you should get to know better, you don’t know your target market well enough.

If you don’t know what questions to ask your clients, then you don’t know the problem domain well enough.

None of these are dead-end problems; they’re merely pointers to where you need to learn more in order to make your marketing itself more valuable to your clients.


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